Sombre post for you today.
I’ve broken this post into 3 short sections with some updates on Eme’s development/School that I’d like to report:
I had one of the worst experiences in school to date when a Mother described to me how her child was being called names and being bullied at school – because the child has special needs.
When the story was being retold to me I felt a range of emotions.
Infuriated! Frustrated! Helpless! Angry!
Fortunately the Mother calmed me down and said she’s conditioned for it and now it rolls of her like water off a duck’s back.
I’m still trying to register that.
I don’t think I’d ever recover if any of my kids are getting bullied or called names.
It would be even worse for me as a parent if I caught wind that it was my children bullying other kids.
But when she said the Mother of the offending child was also branding her child ‘retarded’ that crossed the line.
It reinforces the idea that children learn from their environment.
If parents are hopeless with their moral compass then can we blame children who bully if they pick up these same behaviours at home?
Of course not! They learn from what they see and hear.
I mentioned earlier that Leki and I are working on building respectful and resilient kids and even with our best efforts we can still fall short.
Actions not words.
That’s what kids respond to.
You can say one thing and then do another and they’ll judge you from what you did not what you said.
So with that vent out the way I have also something else to share:
Emelina has learnt the power of lying
Here’s the story… I noticed there was a little toy fish with the tail now broken.
I approached Eme about it and asked: “What happened to the toy Eme? Did you break it?”
Eme’s response: “No Mama – Aneira did it”
Me: “Tell me honestly Eme – did you break the toy?”
Eme: “No Mama – Neriah did it…”
Me: “Eme… this is your last chance… did you break the toy?”
Eme: “Yes Mama, Eme did it. I’m sorry” (with a cheeky smile)
I couldn’t believe how this little girl managed it or if it’s a developmental thing but she will now test the boundaries with her little white lies.
In this short conversation she was trying to blame her cousins who hadn’t visited or played with the broken toy recently.
Once she realised that I wasn’t buying her story she gave up and accepted fault 🙂
I’ll have to be on my game from now on.
The final update is Eme’s successful detachment at School.
At her Montessori school the kiddies are grouped in age groups rather then Year levels.
So the first ‘stage’ to assist with development and eventually detachment from parents is the Nesting/”Nido” age group ranging from 6 months to 3yo where classes can be a weekly session for an hour.
After some time familiarising with the classroom and the teacher plus other kids you can then progress to the next class once you’re around 3yo.
The next age group is “Yellow Group”.
In Yellow Group parents are encouraged to say goodbye to the children in the morning before leaving while trying your best to avoid the drawn out goodbye.
So there I was at our second class into Yellow Group and after our first session I felt that Eme was settling in well with her new classmates.
When I went to say goodbye to Eme in the hallway leading into her classroom and I leaned in for the kiss and hug and then she said: “See ya Mama” turned around and ran excitedly to her Yellow Group.
And just like that… my little girl had cut me from her imaginary umbilical cord 🙂
When her class finished 2 hours later – I was huddled with all the other anxious Mums in the hallway waiting to see how our little ones got on.
Next thing we hear is the door swing open and then the stampede of excited kids looking for the familiar face of Mum or Dad.
Then… out to the confusion I saw my little Eme.
Big eyes, wide brimming grin and a high pitch excited squeal when her eyes locked onto mine.
I felt so relieved that she enjoyed her time away from Mama because she has been my little side kick these last 3 and a bit years but now I feel she’s begun her own unique journey.
Such a #MamaMoment 🙂
Well, there you have it.
A wide ranging experience with pre-school.
Bullying. Lying. And now Flying… Solo!
The adventure continues…