Sad post for you today.
I got a notification off my Facebook feed that this time last year my Grandma Taina visited us in Australia from Tonga.
Around this time of year (every year) from March to May Grandma Taina would stay with us in Melbourne with her 3 month ‘visitors visa’ and enjoy her time with extended family.
She would be with my Mum for most of her stay at her home in the north of Melbourne.
My older sister would often take her to bingo with other ladies to try her luck 🙂
My other sisters would drop in with their kids (Grandma Taina’s great-grandchildren) and spend time with her.
Grandma Taina would then visit her sister who lives in Melbourne, nieces, nephews and extended relatives.
Then… I would host her with my little family and she would stay with us for a week.
I really cherished that time together because we spoke in a language that only love knows.
You see, I wrote this blog post LAST YEAR about wishing I could communicate with my Grandma because I can’t speak my native language well at all.
And now Grandma Taina is resting in Tonga after passing away in Sept 2018 🙁
Oh how I wish I had more time with her!
I wish I could just talk with her one more time.
Have her sing to me or playfully tease her great-grandchildren or see her grin when she’s watching the kids play in front of her.
I miss her so much 🙁
Leki and I talked about this and we realised that there’s two sides to everything after he saw this awesome video from Ryan Daniel Moran.
There are problems we feel in the moment and there are positives that we think about in the rear view mirror.
We feel the problems and we long for the positives.
We rarely pause to appreciate the positives while we’re still in them and instead we just experience them later.
And we get this experience of the times that “used to be”.
Now we both have siblings and we don’t spend 24 hours a day thinking about how much I love and appreciate them.
But… if anything ever happened to any of them all I would ever want is to have my sibling back.
So we saw that there are things in our lives that we can sometimes overlook that if there were taken away from me it would be the thing I longed for the most.
Like the time when my 1yo son is screaming at night in bed.
If anything ever happened to him, all I would ever want would be to comfort a screaming baby.
Or the time when I was 19yo and thinking that I was overweight and unhappy.
But now I wish I had that 19yo body because pushing out my kids has given me a waistline that I’m always working on 🙂
If Leki and I have an argument about something and we don’t talk for a little while to let things simmer down is another example.
But, if anything ever happened to him all I’d want to do is have the chance to just talk to him again.
We rarely, if ever, pause to appreciate the things that are already in our lives that we could be grateful for until it’s too late.
But, you get to control whether you consciously appreciate the things in your life or focus on problems until much later when you have this sense of longing for ‘how things used to be’.
Right now I’m focused trying to be happy and reducing my stress.
Sometimes I’m in the happy place but other times I’m in the tough place and I quickly forget all the things I should be grateful for.
I know someone may be looking at my life and wishing they could have just a little slice of all the things I take for granted.
Just like when I look at someone else’s life and think how I wish those things for my life.
No matter who you are, or what you have or don’t have I can promise you there is someone else looking at your life longing to be in your situation.
Even to be in the situation right now that you see as a problem!
No matter who you are or where you are you have some much to be thankful for and appreciate.
THESE ARE THE GOOD OLD DAYS!
I miss you so much Grandma Taina and I appreciate all the time we spent together.
Even though it’s only been 6 months that you’ve gone to rest I think of you everyday and celebrate your life with our Family.
‘Ofa lahi atu Grandma. I miss you 🙁
Forever in my Heart.